You have announced your engagement and you are starting the planning of your big day.
Years ago it was the tradition that the father of the bride would cover the majority of the cost of the wedding, in reality couples are now putting all their own savings to create the day of their dreams.
So whether or not they are footing the bill it is fair to say that the parents and in laws will want to have some say when it comes to planning your wedding. Now advice and suggestions will always be well meaning, but to you who are overwhelmed with things to do and arrangements to make, it may feel at times as if they are being pushy and interfering.
Just remember that in reality they are probably just excited and want to help.
Now the first thing you need to remember is it is not uncommon that along with all this well meaning advice there are likely to be disagreements and the odd fallout. Its true to say that sometimes you may have to give a gentle reminder about who's wedding it is. After all it is your day and you need to focus on "what it is you want" there is simply no way you can please all of the people all of the time.
However, do try to take a deep breath and just listen to them, at the end of the day some of their advice may be very useful. Just smile and thank them for their advice.
As brides it is so easy to get swept up in the excitement of the wedding and to have someone pointing out the pro's and cons to some things is a good thing. Its useful to have someone who can keep you grounded at times - don't forget the wedding industry love brides and offer a variety of ways to spend your wedding budget and before you know it, you have the whole works and much more.............
Every Bride wants to stay in control of their big day, but there is nothing wrong with accepting some of their help. So to have the best of both worlds think of parts of the wedding that you don't mind handing over, at the end of the day parents just want to help and feel involved. So how about getting them to help with the invitations, or organising the cake?
One area of disagreement is often the guest list - if they are contributing a large share towards the wedding then they are bound to want to have some input, it is understandable that they may want to invite relatives that you may not have seen for years, but if you have to draw the line just sit down and talk to them and discuss a compromise - such as inviting the important relatives to the ceremony and the rest to the evening reception.
Its all really about communication.
In the long run isn't it much nicer to have parents on board with your plans than having everyone at loggerheads - after all your parents and in laws are going to be in your lives long after the wedding day.
If you have any family issues you wish to discuss, just contact me and I will do my best to give you some advice.